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4th May 2005

sweetmsbehavin11:04am:

Had another cancellation for a party for next Sat. i need to get things on the ball, if anyone is reasonably close to where i am (up to 2 hrs) and they want a lingerie and sex toy party in the next week or two, me.  Post back and we can exchange emails and info. I am also selling raffle tickets to anyone in the US for the American Cancer Society, Look better ...feel good program $2 each ticket, and you get a change to win $100 in Undercover Wear and Bedroom Magic products.   I am part of Pittsburgh’s Biggest Pajama Party ever. so if any one is in the area and wants info on that let me know i will tell you how you can go and have a girl night and get chances to win a trip for 2 to Las Vegas (air fare and hotel included) , diamonds, spa treatments  and all kinds of stuff, all kinds of raffles will be going on all night till midnight , to come you need to book a room at the hotel , price is 49.95 for a room and up to 4 girls in a room , (everyone has to be 21), If anyone wants to donate things for the Auctions or Donations  i will be glad to get them and all the proceeds got to the American Cancer Society , so come out have a night out with your friends, and benefits a GREAT cause.

 

Also check out our website if you are interested in seeing what all we have .......... www.mysticalsensations.net you can also order from the site and it will be shipped straight to you!

 

x-posted a bunch of places

28th September 2004

sweetmsbehavin10:27am: New here
Hi im new here ,  Daddy dhutch found this community this am and told me to join so i did , i look foward to meeting all of you

25th May 2004

hisslavekitty10:50pm: X-Posted
So - lately things have been a little more on the vanilla side when it comes to physicality, yet - completely D/s when we ARE having sex. It is amazing to feel this way....to feel the life i want mesh with having to exist. i am extremely happy for the first time in my life....and have been for months - yay!

i was pondering the other day about people who play casually. i have never gone into subspace with someone i didn't have feelings for....is it possible? Also - it would seem difficult to NOT fall in love with someone you are so vulnerable with...hrm...

This is open for discussion....

23rd April 2004

kellygirl_x8:55am: questions
I have realized that after a scene, I tend to become so emotional...a really needy feeling. It can last for a few minutes or even a few days. Does anyone else experience this feeling of neediness?

My questions are...Is there anything that I can do on my own to help alleviate some of the emotions? Or...is this something that I shouldn't even be fighting? Where does this feeling come from?

20th April 2004

hisslavekitty12:32am: Still vulnerable....
i am having this problem....Master and i really played in Toronto, and i was really put into subspace for a prolonged period of time, and now i seem to be still submersed in the after effects.

i feel vulnerable, closed off, quiter - like i do when i am curled up in His arms after a scene....i am just wondering if anyone else has experienced this....?

It has been over aa week now - shouldn't i be able to shake this feeling by now?
Current Mood: thoughtful

16th April 2004

hisslavekitty6:10pm: i have been a bad girl.... (X-Posted)
Master and i had a wonderfully wicked weekend this past weekend, and i am JUST now getting around to posting about it.

i guess the main thing i have to say about it is that i was kept in my place all weekend - constantly reminded that i am His toy, His plaything, His fuck, His slave... i answered room service in nothing but a nightie with my plug inserted, i was locked out of the room barely dressed....shivering in the hallway, i was raped, used as a footstool, sodomized, left on the floor like a puppy at His feet, i crawled, begged, humped, stripped like a dancer....all in only a few days. It felt wonderful, and i was afraid that it would all end too quickly. i went i deep into subspace when i was accidentally choked while He was fucking me, and i was in a very dark place...calling myself names i have called myself before, only in this guttoral, screaming voice that didn't seem to even be my voice. i went deeper and further than i have ever gone...i was so into everything we were doing - writhing on the floor, humping His leg, slapping my own face with His cock....i was a total whore in every sense of the word....and i was reveling in it. i am almost ashamed of myself....but i loved the way He looked at me, the way He refered to my behavior after the weekend was over with a sly grin....i know i pleased Him.

i have been fighting, however, with something new. Something i have always sort of looked down my nose at....and it is the 'Daddy' thing. Now don't get me wrong, i have nothing against the 'little girls' who write about and love their 'Daddies'. it has just never been my thing - at least i THOUGHT it wasn't....then He started talking baby talk to me, telling me oh so sweetly to fuck Him this way, or do that....and i totally got into it. So much so, that it really bothered me most of this week. i know there is nothing wrong with it, it is just so far from my personality to behave that way....and it was a strange first for me. But now that i think about it, i had a one night stand with a friend a long while back who sweetly asked "Do you have cum for me?" as he was fucking me....he asked me like i was a little girl, and i got off to it then, too....i just didn't put it in that context, and never really thought about it afterwards.

Something else happened this week. Master and i began baby steps to opening up our relationship again....He is now playing with another sub - though, not sexually. My jealousies have dissolved, and when i was in class thinking of the two of them together, i smiled, knowing how much He enjoys being above others....how He enjoys watching them beneath Him - and how she was finally getting flogged and more, in a way that is safe and insightful. i just wanted Him and her to be happy....and to have fun, and then to crawl next to Him in bed....with Him that much more pleased with His girl...

i hope He is...

10th April 2004

lapis_lazulia4:26pm: First Pain Experience
I had my first "pain" session outside of a spanking. It was Wednesday. A few weeks ago while we were away for the weekend, my Domme bought some adjustable by screws kind of nipple clamps with a chain between. They are rubber tipped.
When I saw them at first, they both scared me and also made me a bit excited.

So. We used them on Wednesday. First I got a light spanking, to get me into the mood. She kept me on the very edge of slipping into the magical land of sub space. It was a very interesting feeling. she had me on my knees...and she played with my nipples...hard, then soft, then hard. I know she was trying to prepare them a bit. I must have looked a little scared. She is so wonderful. She pulled me to her and stroked my hair and told me it was ok..murmuring to me. It put me at ease. She put one on i think..then had me get on my back. She asked me if I was ready..and she REALLY put the first one on..so it didnt fall off. It HURT. I didn't cry, but oooooh it hurt..then it was ok. She waited a little bit, then put the other one on. Somewhere in there, she told me to play with myself. When the other one was on, and that lat bit of OW was gone..oooooh it felt good. She played with them while they were clamped..oooooooh. I loved the feeling of the weight of the chain and the slight tug. I played with myself until I orgasmed.

Here is the interesting thing. Before she touched my nipples, whhile i was being spanked, I totally GUSHED. Down there. I'm one of those that will do that if someone is playing with me inside with fingers. This time, I wasn't even being touched. It was amazing.

After I got off, she removed the clamps, and held me. I shivered and she covered me up, and laid with me. I kind of dozed on and off, and talked to her. It was a sub spacy sort of afterthing, but she took such good care of me. I didn't experience the drop like last time.

And that was Portia's first adventure into Nippleclamp
Land.

sorry this isnt written more eloquently. :)
Current Mood: satisfied

6th April 2004

funky_doll12:57am: Uh-oh!!!
So it seems that I'm in a bit of trouble.
I've been neglecting my journal (and my emails).

I've been neglecting a lot these days.... But it doesn't feel that way (honest, Sir).

Between work, building a business, planing a birthday, being supportive to those around me whom I LOVE, taking the time to play with Daddy and be played with, and research, watching TV, and spring cleaning ... I used all my time up!

So now... I'm in trouble. I've done a no-no.

As punishment, I've lost one of my masturbation passes. I'd only earned one to begin with & know I'm shit out of luck & I'm not happy about it. I've been working all afternoon and the sun is making is nice and toasty in here.... I'm dying to read a story from www.bdsmlibrary.com. But, I have no pass!

Damn! I must strive to be better.
Current Mood: silly

4th April 2004

hisslavekitty12:43pm: More on 'Fear & Loathing' (X-Posted)
i went to a demo on fear and humiliation/degradation last night. And all i can say is that i learned alot about myself.

Read more...Collapse )
Current Mood: pensive

3rd April 2004

hisslavekitty10:38pm: X-Posted from my own LJ
i watched the television movie about Heidi Fleiss the other night and was surprised at how racy it was....they showed her topless (for about .2 of a second), and the language was pretty harsh for just being on television. Anyhow - the reason i was bringing this up was because there was a particular scene which spoke to me.

Heidi's boyfriend received a 'finders fee' from a madam for bringing her to the house. It was only $450, and her boyfriend, a bookie and a producer, was very wealthy and didn't even need the money. Heidi got angry, and was hitting him, yelling about how he 'sold' her as he argued that he didn't even need the money...then she stopped and looked at him, and told him that she was incredibly turned on.

The next scene, you see them against a raining at his home, him behind her, and he is reaching under her skirt. She tells him to talk dirty to her, and he started to call her "whore...bitch", and she gets off to his hand.

It was SUCH a relief to see that other people - even portrayed on tv - get off to this. And that it was made out to be just a normal thing. It is something i have had a difficult time accepting about myself....that i love being humiliated like that - called names....to be dehumanized....

Maya Angelou calls them 'little murders', being called names. So what does it mean when you LIKE being called that - especially during sex? To some people, it is abuse....but to me, it is an aphrodesiac. Does this mean i feel this way about myself? i have always been so proud of the fact that i was making conscious choices in my BDSM lifestyle, but what does it mean when your body reacts so strongly - that it seems much more deep-seeded than you originally thought?

Master is extremely compassionate and kind, and would NEVER hurt me....but am i hurting myself in the long run by wanting this? Or is this just who i am, and i should accept it with the healthy attitude i have always held on to?

i guess that i have always fought this side of myself - the worrying side, and it was on my mind today.....
Current Mood: contemplative

29th March 2004

hisslavekitty10:59pm: 2 Weeks (X-Posted from my LJ)
Master was here for two whole weeks!!! We had a great time seeing how it will be when we live together. i foresee it as blissful...*sigh*

We have decided to set a 'play date' when we are together. It had been far too long since we had really been intense...Speaking of playing...

"Take off your shirt"
That is how our evening started. He showed me how to knot His ropes for storage from now on before making a rope chastity belt that looped between my legs, and then bound my wrists behind my back. He then put me, forcefully, on my knees over the couch to bound my legs. Slowly, He wrapped the rope around both legs from my ankles to just below my knees.

After making me struggle to the center of the room on my own, He had me kneel up and slapped my face - hard. Then, He backhanded the other cheek. He slapped my breasts over and over...then my face again...He asked me:
"This is how you deserve to be treated, isn't it?"

"yes, Master"

He slapped me again, "This is how you need to be treated, isn't it?"

"yes, Master"

He spit in my face. "This is what you want, isn't it?"
i began to cry....the humiliation of needing this kind of attention was taking over me.
"yes, Master", i whispered between the tears.

He stroked my skin, slapped my breasts again.....i sobbed.
"Where is your place?"

"Beneath You, Master"

"Where do you belong?"

"Beneath You, Master"
i KNOW this.....and sometimes i just forget.

He bound my breasts, i could feel them jut out, grotesquely. He then clamped them with a new clamp....i cried out each time before drifting off into subspace....then i failed at swallowing - AGAIN...and Master has already told me to not dwell on that subject. He is so patient with me.

The next night we made love....it was so beautiful. i finally had an orgasm...and not just one. This medication i am on makes it so difficult to get there - and i just held onto Him, shivering. He told me later that i was so hot...



i am not sure if He will be back this weekend....part of me is really wishing He will...i need to be kissed, caressed, and brought back to life again.
Current Mood: sleepy

12th March 2004

hisnymphette5:01pm: Shadowfind
Posted here are my experiences at Shadowfind (www.shadowfind.com). It was a wonderful time and I can not wait to visit again. Warning... its quite lengthy.

ShadowfindCollapse )

13th March 2004

hisslavekitty9:11pm: X-Posted from my own LJ
Master and i are back from our vacation to my hometown, and with recent events, we have had a conversation that led to this sort of essay entry:

Read more if you are interestedCollapse )
Current Mood: determined

5th March 2004

sissypriss1:03am: 12:47am 05/03/2004
mood: thirsty
music: Great leap forward...billy bragg
Well the mind just wanders when you’ve had a fun pill, a few drinks, a run in your hose and a new sweater that your mistress has just bought you. Besides the maschocist in me was well alive tonight, as I decided to put the liquid eyeliner on the inside as well as the outside. If you know what I mean, then you know, if not, try it for fun next time you need that certain artistic rush of painful clarity. lol

Mistress and I were discussing my puppet/doll fantasies and she decided to glue all my fingers together, so I have doll hands. Typing and smoking, that’s a whole new adventure. But so very interesting, indeed.

One of the things that I love most about Mistress and Sir, is Mistress Toulina’s directness and Sir Jason’s subtlety. Both are so adept to crawl under the covers of my decadences and force me to look and experience not what I think I want, but rather what I need.

So many people I know (in the darker world) are just so thirsty for someone to have a clue, and I’m blessed with people who seem to know me so well.

Serving, and swinging my ass, as my heels make me do, Gee fetching things can be so much fun. Besides the slinky feel of new hose (that) Mistress just bought me, tight over freshly shaved legs. I’m such a sensation junky, I think. The smell of my perfume, the clinginess and tugyness of it all makes me just twitch in that good way.

So many women and boys I’ve wasted so much time, just never had a clue, I suppose someday I will need to acknowledge some sort of regret on my epitaph and whatnot, it would have to be “having wasted so much time, on so many interesting people, I never really gave a chance to”.
Like the song says, “You’ve gotta work out your own salvation”
Have you worked out yours?
Not sure if I have but I feel I’m on the right path.

3rd March 2004

lapis_lazulia3:42pm: YAY New community
YAY new community. Ok--quick intro, then this dream i have. im a sub, i have a femme Domme who is also my gf. this is an interesting dream i had




I usually don't dream about people I am involved with in real life. People on the net i talk to--sure, but not my actual real people.

So I happened to have a dream about my gf, who also happens to be my Domme. Woot.

This is what it was about.

I was at some sort of conference, in a large hotel. I don't know why I was there, but I was milling around a big room with lots of people and we were all dressed in business clothing, but, they all looked slightly sexy in a vague way.

There was this woman, dressed in a short suit, gray short trench coat, stockings, heels. She looked sort of out of place, but very beautiful. She sort of looked like Milla Jovavich or however you spell her name, black hair in a bob with bangs.

She got up on a sort of stage and was reading something, like a poem, or a letter. She looked so nervous and so vulnerable. I also at that moment realized I was wearing sort of a necklace, but it wasn't. I looked around and there were other people wearing the same sort of jewelry, but not EVERYONE in the room was.

I felt like I needed to talk to her, and she kept looking at me. I walked over and introduced myself, and she introduced herself. We chatted, and I noticed she had the same necklace as me.
She kept saying she had something to give me, and that we should go up to her room. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a man looking at the girl, watching her every move, but not in a mean way, a very caring way.

We went up to her room and she took off her coat, handed me a letter with my name on the envelope. I opened it, and it was from my gf, who wrote that I had picked the right girl, and that I should come back to her room, the girl and I. I was confused.

I saw the girl looking at my neck jewelry. I asked her what it was, becase I didn't know.

She looked at me like i was crazy and said that all slaves had to wear one to this conference. it's how people know you're Domme/master had put you on the floor.

I still didn't know what this meant.
It was kinda weird, but at the same time hot.

We went up to our room, and my lady was sitting on the bed


THEN I WOKE UP

ARRG ARRG ARRG.

anywho.
Current Mood: curious

24th February 2004

hisnymphette6:08pm: Party!
I attended the same party that hisslavekitty, so I thought I would post my experience:-) Enjoy!

This saturday evening I attended my first private play party held by a friend of mine, and many of my friends were also there, and it was a lovely time. Before we left, Master pulled me close to him and told me that I was to address him appropriately and serve him the entire evening. I was very exicted and nervous. I asked him what rules I would need to follow besides the typical ones throughout the party. I was so ask him before speaking to anyone directly, at least at first. Also, he told me I was not to look at anyone directly in the eye. This caused a very gutteral reaction from me because I grew up getting in trouble for not looking into peoples eyes when I spoke to them mainly because my father is nearly deaf, so it is very hard for me not do so. Seeing my discomfort, Master told me that I did not have to follow that rule this evening and we would work on this in the future, for which I was thankful.

We then got dressed and I gathered the toys together (ropes, flogger, wrist cuffs) into a bag we left. I wore my strapless corset and short black skirt complete with thigh highs and heals. Master looked wonderful in dark pants, a button-up shirt, and a tie. I was his servent, his slave, and I felt like it...

Once we arrived we were greeted by our host, and I asked permission to greet everyone. It was wonderful to see everyone! Many of the people I am close to in the scene are submissive females, each of which were poised at thier Master's feet, and I took the same position, which I loved. I rested my head on Master's lap as we chatted with those around us (with his permission of course). Throughout the evening, I served Master, and he teased and tormented me in front of everything.

The lovely Kitty was our desert tray. We took brownies off of her and returned to our seats and enjoyed them. Master then told me to go back over to Kitty and eat a crumb off of her stomach, while everyone watched. No one else had eaten off of her yet, I was nervous to be first. But I obeyed, of course. I ate a crumb off of her belly, but one poised just next to her nipple just looked so tempting I had to take that one too! I thanked her and walked back to Master.

Then things got a bit more intense...

A recent desire of mine is to have Master use a knife on me, not to cut me (blood play is not my thing) but to intimidate me and control me. A few time during the evening he pulled out his knife and ran it over my skin. I sat very still and did not look at anyone, but I heard one girl say "that is so hot" as she watched Master torture me.

After a little torture in the middle of the group, including a spanking for forgetting to adress him correctly, he fitted me into my wrist cuffs. It was the first time I'd gotten to wear them since we purchased them. They were wonderful. Master then let me to a bondage chair and he buckled my hands behind me. It was time to play.

Breasts. Legs. Back. Ass. Arms. Not a part of me was left touched by the flogger, a candle, or Master's wonderful hands. I do not really like the term 'subspace' as a personal preference, but I was definately gone. I could not speak. I could only moan.

After a satisfying cool down, I knew I could not walk, so Master brought me a chair and helped me colapse into it. A wonderful feeling. He reset my corset and covered me in his coat, then comforted me.

When we got home, I finished my evening of service to him by being taken. We fell asleep in each others arms.

It was a beautiful evening.
hisslavekitty11:26am: X-Posted
Well, Saturday night, Master hosted our first play party in the basement...we worked all day to create a dungeon-like setting, and it was really intimate and nice...everyone seemed to have a wonderful time. i even broke in the new fondue pot!

Master surprised me with a romantic gesture - He made one of my fantasies come true. He had arranged for someone to make gooey brownies, and when He blindfolded, cuffed my wrists and ankles, and pretty much made me feel like i was about to be played with, He laid me down and spread out the desserts on my skin for people to enjoy. Then, people ate off of me....it was delicious in more ways than one...i felt so beautiful - people caressed my skin, and whispered "thank you" in my ear...others told me how gorgeous i looked...it was erotic, sensual, and i felt totally objectified to hear people talking about me as if i weren't there....it was both humiliating and fucking amazing....

He played with me later, bent over the spanking bench. i was having a difficult time at first...i was distracted by noises from others and just knowing there were probably eyes on me. He started with His hands, and then the riding crop, then He pulled out the flogger and i went WAY into subspace....apparently He whipped me with the short whip for some time after, and i never even flinched....i had four lovely welts for hours afterwards.

i am wanting to do another one soon....something maybe more intimate....something that can go a little further....we were so busy trying to make sure everyone was having a good time - it was difficult for Him to do some of the things He had mentioned to me...like more humiliation and using me as furniture....it was also difficult to watch others' scenes....it would be nice to be a part of the audience....

After the party was over, and the mess cleaned up - Master took me upstairs to fuck me hard....we ended up making love and holding eachother all night.
Current Mood: high
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